


Up top!

by cloudtopcruise



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, Friendship, I do not know if I should rate this T or M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-07 10:46:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12839538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cloudtopcruise/pseuds/cloudtopcruise
Summary: Magnus fails to put a  "WARNING: NUDE AND BLOODY INSIDE" sign on the door.





	Up top!

**Author's Note:**

> A beloved friend of mine mentioned Brad offhand one single time and then I spiraled into Bradnus hell. How y'all doin
> 
> (warning: nudity and blood in this fic)

Taako thinks he can be forgiven for screaming.

He’s seen some things he’d rather not have seen in his dorm from time to time, of course, but this is actively alarming. From the moment he opens the door, catching a flash of green skin confuses him because last he’d checked neither Magnus nor Merle were particularly green. But the next observation he makes is that it’s a lot of green skin, completely bare green skin, and it’s overlapped with more bare skin with a more Magnus-like color — probably because it is Magnus. And said Magnus skin is completely covered in dried blood, deep scratches, and what look to be huge bite marks from something with fangs. 

So yes, screaming is an acceptable, nay, _natural_ response.

The person to whom the green skin belongs is startled enough to sit upright, and Taako can see he’s an orc man he doesn’t recognize (though that does explain the bites and scratches). Magnus isn’t as affected, but he does let out an extended groan followed by, “The hell, Taako?”

“Well, first of all, obviously:” Taako walks closer and holds out his hand above Magnus. Magnus reacts slowly, staring blearily up at Taako for a few seconds before he finally returns the high-five. When they connect, their hands make a very pathetic _splapt_ sound. “Real 2 outta 10 on that one, Mags. But secondly, you’re a man of civilized society; have the decency to at least put a sock on the doorknob so people don’t just walk into some Stanley Kubrick nightmare.”

Magnus groans again and shifts to sit up slightly. “I thought you’d be out longer.”

“Well that’s on you. I’m an unpredictable force of nature, you know that,” Taako says. “And now your carelessness has burned a scar unto my innocent eyes. I hope you’re happy.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Taako can see the orc man reach to grab a pair of glasses off the nightstand. He puts them on and looks at Taako pointedly enough that Taako actually turns his gaze to him. “Good morning, Taako!” the orc says, strangely cheerful for someone who’s just been forcefully awakened.

It occurs to Taako that the greeting was way too casual for a stranger, or even a fan. Was he supposed to know this guy? “...What’s crackin’, my man?” Taako says, trying to bring a fake sparkle of recognition to his eyes.

“I’m actually glad you’re here right now,” the mystery orc says. Taako pauses to consider this. Now that he knows that specific origins of Magnus’ wounds, he supposed it wasn’t an entirely objectionable scene, but— “…No, not because of that. I’m glad because I can finally talk to you about these complaints.”

“Complaints?” Taako looks closer at the orc man, and then it hits him. He isn’t as recognizable without work-formal clothes or a clipboard in hand, but the long ponytail is somewhat familiar, and the smile the orc is giving him seems to be whispering the word “bureaucracy” straight into Taako’s ear. His name hasn’t quite reached him (Brett or something? Like, Brad maybe?), but Taako can at least identify him as _that one HR guy_. He immediately snaps his head toward Magnus to glare at him accusingly. “Magnus, no!” he says. “I’m taking back my high-five!”

Magnus rolls his eyes. “You’re too late,” he says. “You can’t take back a high-five, your hand’s already approved of me.”

“That was before I knew you were hand-delivering me a narc to my door,” Taako says, glare not lightening whatsoever.

“Aw, c’mon, Brad’s not a narc,” Magnus says (oh, good, so it is Brad).

Brad pats Magnus gently on the shoulder. “I am kind of being a narc right now,” he says, voice almost consoling.

“See? This guy gets it.”

“Okay, narcing or not-narcing aside,” Magnus says, “you can’t just shittalk Brad right in front of him like this.”

“Fine.” Taako turns to face Brad, face serious. “Brad, step out so we can shittalk you in peace.”

Even if he isn’t looking at Magnus, Taako can feel his disapproving frown directed at him. “Taako…”

“Oh, no, it’s fine!” Brad says, still disturbingly cheerful. For Magnus’ sake, Taako hopes he has more settings than this. “Just come get me when you’re done.”

Brad keeps himself covered with the sheet while he stands and looks around the floor for his clothing. No one says anything, the only sound in the room being Brad’s shuffling around the floor and Magnus sighing, attempting to settle back down and closing his eyes. Taako crosses his arms and watches as Brad finally finds his pants and pulls them on — maybe inappropriate, thinking about it, and he has now seen more of Brad from HR’s ass that he wishes he ever had to. He almost raises an issue when Brad starts to look for his shirt; just pants is plenty to retain his modesty. Brad does fortunately locate his shirt faster than he does his pants, but he takes the time to button it up all the way (and Taako actually does speak up with, “Come ON!” as he does so). Brad gives him a friendly wave as he exits the room, which Taako returns with a cold, judging stare.

Taako continues to stare quietly at the door for a few moments. “…Fuck, forgot what I was gonna say.”

Magnus opens one eye to glance at him. “Was it, ‘That’s enough being a dick for one day, I’m going to leave now?’”

“Fo’ sho’ I’ve had way more than enough dick today. But I had a sick burn lined up, and I lost it because HR dude needed an entire goddamn paragraph to get some clothes on.” Taako sighs. “Listen homie, I’m all for you gettin’ out there, getting your dick — does ‘wet’ still apply here? I’m never sure — but damn, don’t bring over people who need to incorporate Lecturing Taako into their walk of shame.”

The annoyance in Magnus’ eyes falters, and is replaced with something kind of…serious. This startles Taako a little; as great a bit as it was, he wouldn’t have gone through with it if he’d known it would actually upset Magnus.

“Uhh, Taako...” Magnus sits up all the way, and tugs the sheets around to cover himself. He pauses, looking hesitant to say whatever it is he’s trying to, though Taako gets the sense that that the hesitation isn’t aimed at him. “I kinda think this is like…a real thing.”

Taako stays quiet for a few moments, processing this. “Like...how real?”

Magnus scratches the back of his head. “Pretty real, I guess…?” he says. “I mean, if anything, I, uh...want it to be a real thing.”

...That’s very new. There’s probably something important Taako should say here. Something...serious. Something sentimental. Something supportive.

“Oh," Taako says. "Dope.”

Magnus smiles a bit. “Yeah, dope.”

Taako holds his palm out, and this time when Magnus high-fives him it makes the most satisfying _clap_ Taako’s ever heard.

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing another Bradnus fic that contains significantly more....Bradnus......but this idea came to me and was much shorter so I just banged this one out first haha


End file.
